REAL COWBOY COOKING
This is from National Lampoon Mag, circa 1970. Don't make these delicious recipes all at once-save them for a special occasion!

What Is This Shit Stew
Also known as What Is This Shit Stew, What Is This Shit Stew, What Is This Shit Stew, and What Is This Shit Stew.
5 lbs. beans
5 cups water
5 lbs. flour
5 cups salt
5 lbs. droppins'
Plenty of cooking fat
Cook your beans until they're soft. Combine all ingredients and mix them up until they're a nice thick concoction Then fry in some more cooking fat until it looks done.

Slimebelly Snakeass Sodhole Skunk Pie
5 lbs. beans, cooked
5 lbs. salt
5 lbs. flour
5 cups water
5 lbs. assorted foliage
Plenty of cooking fat
Mix all your it ingredients together until they form a nice smooth paste. Fill up a well-greased pie tin with the paste, and bake for an hour or two until it gets nice and brown and bubbly.

Muthafuck Yo' Ass Brown Bitch Biscuits
5 lbs. beans
5 lbs. salt
5 lbs. flour
5 lbs. water
Plenty of cooking fat
Mix beans, flour, salt, and water in a bowl until it all forms a mash. Spoon out gobs of it on a well-greased biscuit pan and bake in a 400-degree oven until they're all brown and pretty.
Note: The beans in this recipe are uncooked, which gives the biscuits a slightly drier, crunchier texture.